Raven emailed me a link
to this story in the Onion:
Heroic Computer Dies to Save World From Master's Thesis:
"This fearless little machine saved me from unspoken hours of exasperated
head-scratching and eyestrain, as well as years of agonizing self-doubt
over my decision to devote my life to teaching," said professor John
Rebson, who had already read through three drafts of Samoskevich's
sprawling, 38,000-word dissertation, titled A Hermeneutical Exploration Of
Onomatopoeia In The Works Of William Carlos Williams As It May Or May Not
Relate To Post-Agrarian Appalachia. "It was an incredible act of bravery.
This laptop sacrificed itself in order to put an end to Jill's senseless
Nothing like …continue.
I sometimes joke that I must be adopted because my parents have no aptitude
for computers. I could make a similar joke about writing. Many of my
immediate family, despite decent educations, seem to be incapable of
writing a simple English sentence, much less a coherent paragraph.
One relative writes emails that are bereft of punctuation: neither a comma
nor a full stop (period) is to be found. Capital letters occur, but too
randomly for my liking. And everything is linked into one paragraph, no
matter how long or disjointed. Yet, I've received adequately punctuated
handwritten letters and postcards from him. I attribute his email
slovenliness to a combination …continue.
Harold Pinter's speech
on accepting the 2005 Nobel Prize for Literature.
I put to you that the United States is without doubt the greatest show on the road.
Brutal, indifferent, scornful and ruthless it may be
but it is also very clever.
As a salesman it is out on its own
and its most saleable commodity is self love.
It's a winner.
Listen to all American presidents on television say the words,
'the American people', as in the sentence,
'I say to the American people it is time to pray
and to defend the rights of the American people
and I ask the American people to trust their president
in the action he …continue.